- Have you read any of my other writings on this subject?
- It was never an I told you so.
- It was a solution, how do we keep this from happening again?
- How do we try to set up some kind of forums or groups or even an independent web page so that African brothers and sisters can learn about places before they venture out?
If you read the information from the University of Missouri at Columbia or even the Chamber of Commerce website you'll think that city is a place where God vacations. That isn't true. That area of Missouri is the official Methamphetamine Capital of the United States.
Furthermore, you cannot discuss a solution without discussing the problem, accurately, honestly, and with great humility and deference. In my writings I have never pulled back on the punch that African Americans have created too many outlandish pejoratives to apply to the backs of new African immigrants. I've never, ever had a one-sided view of this situation. Black Americans, in my opinion and as I've stated before, are even MORE culpable for the lack of brotherhood paid towards Africans. The only exception I've seen with this is in the various White churches - not the Black Baptist church. The Catholics, Mormons, Episcopalians? I can't even start writing all the instances I've seen where African immigrants have been helped to re-settle. African Americans appear to be more willing to give some chicken and biscuit eating preacher tens and hundreds of thousands of dollars to "spread the gospel" and "build wells."
If you had read my writings before you would know that I am absolutely NOT a Black American who approaches Africans with haughtiness. I require that anyone who is associated with me deal with one thing: truth.
If you can't handle the truth, some truth, some truths, or even an honest conversation you probably won't like what I have to say.
Finally. That woman's son is dead. The family, hopefully, will recover. I'm not in the business of giving some kind of fake sentiments which will not fill a bucket for the thirsty. I would like to address the problem, air the differences, atone for the wrongs, and then get on the road to recovery.
Any psychologist, minister, psychiatrist, teacher will tell you: You can't fix a problem 'til you admit there is a problem. And just saying, "there's a problem" is a cop out which stinks to the highest heaven. All I have ever asked is that we not continue to act as if there's no elephant in the room. Let's stop acting like we're not evil to each other. Let's stop acting like Arab Muslims AREN'T racist. Let's stop acting as if academic excellence and achievements are solo pursuits and therefore the success is the sole property of the individual. Let's cut it short and say, "let's stop emoting and move towards motion."
The truth shall set us on the road of being free (I don't say "make us free) because I have known folks who have done everything right, committed no errors against any person, and still been knocked down). I don't believe that a plan, a sound plan will always yield success. I do believe that success will never come to someone who does not have a plan. Sometimes it takes many, many, many plans in order to achieve success.
Many immature people like to say, "don't talk about the negatives, let's just discuss the positive (solutions)." This is the biggest load of bullshit on two feet and ten toes. How can you not discuss the possible responses, obstacles, etc. which you might encounter in order to have several existing plans of action to overcome these options? Ridiculous people say, "God will provide." Sit in your house 'til you die of starvation - faith without works is dead. You gotta move something.
We need a plan. I simply discussed some of the things which might be obstacles. It turned you off. You didn't want to hear my truth. And please, don't even stress yourself by using another tired phrase, "there's wrong on both sides." Yeah, but both sides are having more and more health, physical, emotional, etc. issues which can be most appropriately addressed together. The African knows nothing of the particular US malady of inculcated victimhood and the African American needs to catch some of the African's ability to persevere no matter what. The African could DEFINITELY learn from the African American many things.
I pointed out what the African would know from this specific (me) African American had there been so mechanism for the exchange of information in place. I'm not the only one who has knowledge of Mizzou and Columbia, MO.
Sad that you saw nothing more than words in my response. Sad that you were unable to take your "you" out of the comprehending of my words.
La Vonda R. Staples
On Sun, Aug 21, 2011 at 4:13 AM, Lily Owusu-darkwa <lily.odarkwa@gmail.com> wrote:
Dear La Vonda,I don't think what we need is the "I told you so". This is a terribly tragic story and most Africans, if not all, are painfully aware of difficulties new immigrants may face in this country. America is not an easy place, only the uninformed will believe that. And am not sure it is Africans who do not want to reach out to their American sisters and brothers. It's all too easy to blame Africans for the chasm that seems to exist between the two groups. We cannot begin to heal the rift with this kind of chastisement; I do not believe this is the opportune time.Lily.
Sent from my iPadToyinThis is why I wrote some of those rantings/ravings last week. I would really like for new immigrants to know that the United States is a largely uninhabited nation with very, very few major cities and comprised primarily of small towns. The small towns have very little services as most centers for health, welfare and education are situated in the major metro areas. Further, I live in the state in the article. There is nothing in Columbia except for the university and the various restaurants which serve that institutions. I think I mentioned those institutions when I talked about sports players with "full rides" and our forty or so pageant winners who receive scholarships. I know that's a tiny, tiny amount when stacked against the total student population. But to that fact to the side in context.The people who are born and raised in Columbia cannot qualify, academically or financially, to attend "Mizzou." This is a university famous for the law school (the integration of which in the late 1950's resulted in a landmark court case as well as a vanished first Black law school admit Mr. James Meredith). Further, the town is a place of either great wealth or abject poverty. The poor of Columbia have been overtaken by the scourge of methamphetamine.I'm going to stop there. Do you see what I say when I keep yelling at the trees, "Black Africans and Black Americans NEED each other?" If the Ghanaian family had connected with me I would have told them, "unless you have a job at the university or an independent business such as hairbraiding (there are enough Black female students to support a natural beauty salon), don't come here." The place is so isolated. After the event I would have told them, "do what you can to get to St. Louis and take your son to Barnes-Jewish Hospital." At Barnes, there are hospice and family services for family support. Even with all of that - the poor are generally situated in American large cities because that is where the welfare and medical services are offered.I have seen photos of African brothers and sisters. Standing there in borrowed gold by some stranger's Beemer or Benz. How sad is that?This is no place to be lost. It is unfortunate that some of my elite African acquaintances feel that America is an "easy win" and that Black Americans are "just plain lazy." I do agree that culturally internalized permanent victim status DOES INDEED EXIST! But think how much the way could be made easier for a Nigerian, Ghanian, or Senegalese who arrive here without Dr. in front of their name if we would only begin to just talk to each other?May that sweet young man rest in peace. I experienced my joy with my son last night. My son is a year younger than the boy who sleeps. My grandmother was right when she prepared me for the possibility of living beyond the life of my children. She would say, "they ain't only takin' old folks to the graveyard." She is right.I hope there is somebody somewhere who FINALLY gets a clue and starts to form NON-ACADEMIC OR NON-PROFESSIONAL groups for African immigrants. I"m tired of my African folks being scared of me, giving me that same stupid ass rude answer when I ask where they're from, "I'm from Africa" or the out and out rudeness that I KNOW they would never use to their mama, aunt, or grandma. Or the condescension I used to get from African women, snapping fingers and rolling eyes and speaking French in front of me when they have no idea that I understood every word.Sometimes, on this list, I feel like you all feel that all of the negativity in the African and Black problem ONLY comes from Black Americans. Sweethearts and gentle people, I have received high handedness from Africans as well. Too bad and so sad - we need each other. But I've said that once or twice, now haven't I?La Vonda R. Staples--On Sat, Aug 20, 2011 at 11:42 AM, toyin adepoju <toyin.adepoju@googlemail.com> wrote:
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Alen Ighedosa <aighedosa@yahoo.com>
Date: 20 August 2011 05:38
Subject: NigerianID | A DYING MUSLIM'S WISH OVER-RULED: A TRUE STORY
To: Nigerian IDENTITY <NigerianID@yahoogroups.com>
A DYING MUSLIM'S WISH OVER-RULED.A GHANAIAN FAMILY'S WOES IN KANSAS CITY, USAA Ghanaian family won the Diversity Visa (DV) Lottery in Ghana. Like most deprived and under-privileged Africans, they raised enough money to buy flight tickets. The father in his late 50's, the mother 42, and a son who was 22 were ready for the life-dream journey to the land of opportunity where milk and honey flowed and dollar bills littered the sidewalks for any interested walker to pickup – the United States of America. This was December of 2006.Coincidentally, the father knew a Ghanaian final year student at the University of Missouri in Columbia, Missouri State USA who was visiting home on holidays. This student apparently agreed to be their host upon arrival in the USA. Finally, this naïve Muslim family ended up in a small university town called Columbia, in the State of Missouri, USA with their student host. The city of Columbia is the seat of the main campus of the University of Missouri system and other smaller colleges. Sooner, their host graduated and moved out of Columbia in pursuit of his life dreams. Now, this family was alone in Columbia with no other point of reference.As they struggled to get their feet on the ground in Columbia by doing menial jobs and/or taking classes in a college, their son became ill and was subsequently diagnosed for a terminal cancer. The family was eventually advised that their son's type of cancer would be better treated at the University of Kansas Medical Center in Kansas City, about 150 miles away. That meant relocation for the entire family. Mind you: The parents had no jobs nor benefits.Some how they were all transported to KU medical center in Kansas City where they knew nobody and had no resources for accommodation or funds to feed. They literarily became destitute and homeless in the Medical Center and resorted to begging for alms, as their son lay critically and terminally ill in a hospital bed. They were finally told the inevitable news that their son had no chance of survival and that his death was a matter of time, etc.After languishing in the hospital lobby for about three months, the father begged for donations from the hospital staff for the sole purpose of visiting home in Ghana to sell some landed property and return with some cash to offset some of the accumulating bills. He traveled to Ghana and was not heard from for over four months! Now the wife was left alone with their dying son in the hospital. She painfully decided to make a daunting request. She asked to be put in contact with the Muslim Community in Kansas City. Surprisingly, her request of them was not money for food. Her request was for the Muslim Community to make sure her son gets a Muslim burial when he dies. The Islamic Community contacted the Ghanaian Community in Kansas City, but none of their members was interested enough to visit the dying young man in the hospital.Yes. The long expected happened. Their son died on Friday, July 29, 2011. Now the main twist in the story: The hospital gave the woman some money, arranged for her flight to join her husband in Ghana and claimed their son's dead body for research.What is the message from this? VISA lottery recipients: Beware! It is not as rosy in America as you are made to believe. Americans do not sleep in the afternoon as the British do. Americans work very hard for their money. You earn your living in the United States. If you cannot explain your source of wealth in the United States, you are a suspect and most likely a criminal. The Internal Revenue Service will be knocking on your doors eventually. Yes. It is a land of opportunity quite all right, but to get a free lunch, you have to be declared destitute. End.(Signed)Alen IghedosaAlenbaluye (Alen) Ighedosa__._,_.___"No part of any discussion on NigerianID may be used, quoted, or referred to, without the express permission of the individual author, or the Chief moderator All discussions on NigerianID are the express property of the author and NigerianID." Copyright 2006-2011. NigerianID. All Rights Reserved.
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unsubscribe@googlegroups.com--La Vonda R. StaplesAdjunct Professor, Department of Social SciencesCommunity College of the District of Columbia"It is the duty of all who have been fortunate to receive an education to assist others in the same pursuit."
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La Vonda R. Staples
Adjunct Professor, Department of Social Sciences
Community College of the District of Columbia
314-570-6483
"It is the duty of all who have been fortunate to receive an education to assist others in the same pursuit."
You received this message because you are subscribed to the "USA-Africa Dialogue Series" moderated by Toyin Falola, University of Texas at Austin.
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